Rejection from the church I loved and still do.

I personaly fell in love with the episcopal's church on its tradtion and sturture. Sadly it did not do same with me, All I wanted was to become a Deacon in this church and I mind you a post that is not even a real job. I was told it was just replacement for me, not being able to be a priest. I belong to the Episcopal's church of Connecticut, but i feel they rejected me for my learning disable. But, they were not honest about it. As you can already tell my grammer is big issue and make my writing at time seem like a retard person. Nevertheless, I am not retard person, I knew from the age of 13 or 14 years old. I was called to service my Lord and master Jesus Christ. I think in all honest the episcopal's church only wants to perfect people and can do away with rest of it. Ironicaly, I broke from Roman catholicism, finding Protestantism more opening to other. Nevertheless, the Episcopal's church I guess is very much like Roman Catholics only picking the perfect. paradoxly, Paul wrote into today reading how God pick weak and foolish over the wise and powerful. I guess the catholics and Anglicans did not get that memo as of yet. I know God is calling me and I am trying to my best to do his will over mine.